For the Mum Who thinks she is Failing

You're not.

I know motherhood can be hard. I know it can be overwhelming. I especially know it can be lonely. But I know you're not failing. You know why I know? Because I've been there. I've felt like my little boy deserved more attention and more patience. I've convinced myself that I wasn't doing a good job because his storybooks sit there unread. I've gotten annoyed when he just wouldn't sit and play with his toys. I've felt guilty because I've forgotten to wash his teeth one day. All this and my baby is only 8 months old!

I was prepared for the tough days my newborn would bring - the tiredness, the hormones even the sore who-ha. But I hadn't put much thought into how I would feel when my baby became a little boy. How much should he eat? Can he drink water? What's that rash? Why won't you sleep? Are you teething? Should you be walking by now? Please stop crying. Don't pull mummy's hair. What do I say when he chucks a tantrum? Should I take his dummy away? Please sleep safely. Motherhood is tough, I won't lie. Afterall, I've never met another mother who spouted that "motherhood is the easiest thing I've ever done".

You're not failing.

A fellow, stay-at-home mum blogger, summarised the difficulty of motherhood perfectly -

In Motherhood, nothing is about mine

You don't simply wake up in the morning, you don't eat when you're hungry, you don't even get a little bit of work done when you want. Everything needs a strategy because your life now revolves around a little human. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change a thing. It's just easy to miss the simplicities of pre-motherhood days and easy to understand the frustrations we sometimes now face.

Perhaps, divert your energy and focus on your accomplishments for the day. All of the smiles, meals made, nappies changed, tickle time, milestones reached, hugs and kisses, and more. Rachel at Findingjoy.com wrote that "We make mistakes. We’re out of breath, racing, and exhausted, but truly not failing. Failing means stopping. Not getting up, not trying, not giving. That’s not you." Nothing could be more true.

Admitting that motherhood is hard, doesn't mean you are doing it wrong. You are not failing. You are simply rising to the hard tasks and growing as a mum. Forgive yourself and try again to tomorrow!

Phoebe

xo